


Hiiragi (Holly)

by Shellyyum



Series: The Evil Within [2]
Category: The Evil Within (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Death, F/M, M/M, Sorrow, joy, reflections
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-28
Updated: 2019-11-28
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:01:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21588781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shellyyum/pseuds/Shellyyum
Summary: Sebastian thinks back on his journey through TEW and TEW2 and all that he has gained and lost.Is there sympathy for the ill fated?
Relationships: Sebastian Castellanos/Joseph Oda
Series: The Evil Within [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1743373
Kudos: 12





	Hiiragi (Holly)

All that there was and could be, and on this long road ahead, Sebastian kept a steady grip on the tattered life he once recognized. The kind that resembled normalcy and functionality, and the one that he drove away from and as Lily slept holding her doll, the kind of regret bubbled up and found himself breaking down.

Had he done enough?

Was there anymore to be done than grasping the future that he now sought and created, today and maybe tomorrow could be better on this road but with no real destination, the journey itself felt flat and desperate. How could he trust Kidman now after her change of heart? Was it genuine? Why continue questioning what he knew personally? What his daughter entrusted herself to and what he fought harder against? 

He lost so much. He lost the reorganization of a life gone by and any semblance of trying, striving to pick up felt dishonest and distrustful; Why was possible now with his daughter by his side? Jesus. Why the influx of loss just clouding him now? There was some color in his life and Lily's eyes although he would figure out she'd be okay, he just wouldn't be.

 **He lost Myra**. 

Lily's mother.

Whom, he pegged as crazy or just delusional or maybe he was the one that didn't wish to believe that the fire was staged and that Lily was used for that infernal machine-STEM, until now. Until he rescued her and kissed Myra a farewell, never ever tearing that wedding ring off for it was a sign that he couldn't forget. That he ought to hold in the memories but as they spilled over that edge, he was no longer linked together with that joyous home life, he always made for himself. Always had in made for idyllic wondering passed. They passed when he said farewell to Myra then. 

**Joseph.**

Goddammit.

Why couldn't Sebastian tried harder to find his partner and one time love interest? I mean, he loved Myra but there was something uniquely passive and quiet in Joseph, and Sebastian lit up every time when Joseph said, "Seb." Why hadn't Sebastian washed away the regrets with alcohol? Maybe because, he had every reason to keep searching and have faith in Kidman, and for their search for Joseph Oda. Was it some mistake that Sebastian missed the way Joseph tasted and felt in those private moments? And like the holly dangling from the door frame at Christmas time, so ephemeral. So missed and in the name of love, the name of untouched passion and best kissers, Joseph ranked high. Ranked higher than maybe even Myra but, he still failed to save someone so fundamental to his being, so gone, now but maybe Kidman wasn't so sure of that. Joseph was alive and that mattered. Joseph Oda was fucking alive and he'd leave that to Kidman.

Torn asunder from all Sebastian figured out to be his truth, the wilderness of tears just trickled down and all he could do was express what wasn't said anymore. Unspoken and bested was the death of others in the wake of STEM and MOBIUS' scheming, which purpose stripped down free will and individuality.

Who desired a world without laughter and even the form of humanity?

That wasn't the world that Sebastian figured Lily should grow and form into and like all things, said and done, nothing was final when the premiere hadn't happened yet. 

When nothing failed and all options were thrown aside, he couldn't recollect and piece the very sky then, when he married Myra, joined KCPD, gained Lily, and had Joseph there. What color was it then as opposed to now? Now longer ambient and silent in his longings but he kept it silent in the long way from home. Could he go back to Krimson City, again?

Ambiguous as life made itself out to be, he knew that he mattered and the lives of those shaped him, mattered and that they weren't ephemeral. 

Nothing had to be in these fragments of whispers, kisses, and promises.

From Myra to Joseph and finally Lily, Sebastian had a duty to make his life last more than one season. He wasn't holly. 


End file.
